EGO ENVY AND EXPECTATIONS ARE OUR REAL ENEMIES.

By Muri Chari

We need to understand that ego is a high opinion of ourselves and is pernicious to our happiness. Very few people will be our real friends and rest all fall into the category of sycophants. Let ego perish and happiness flourish should be our watch word. Ego may give a kick but in the long run it creates a blockade between us and others. It is pernicious to having healthy relationships. Ego is self-aggrandizement at best. We praise ourselves and expect adoration from others. When we act from the basis of ego that evokes ego in others as well and there is a virtual fight for supremacy. An entire book on Ego is written by the young legendary author Ryan Holiday and is worth reading, understanding, and implementing. Ego is an internecine element which acts as a saboteur of all our happiness and a truly evolved life. Our ego makes us believe that we are at the center of the whole universe. It makes us feel as if we are bigger than the sprawling Universe itself. Even the ignoramus feels that he is very knowledgeable and knows everything. It blocks acquisition of new learning thus blighting our growth. Ego is the hard shell like the back of a turtle blocking the flow of bliss, joy, affluence, and serenity. Our bloated ego makes us hedonistic and Narcissist. We turn away genuine people from us. Dr. Wayne Dyer the legendary and maverick author, speaker and inspirational leader rightly puts “Edging God Out.” Ego is the acronym for the foregoing aphorism.

Envy is another enemy which makes us feel jealous about others’ success. We ostracize ourselves by indulging in envy. It is the green monster making us feel miserable and nursing hatred for others. If this same energy is used to burgeon our wealth of material riches and spiritual development, we would be much better off. Most of us indulge in hero-worshipping and emulating our idols without trying to prop up our stature. All our energies and time are spent on envying others. To be happy we need to be contented and at the same time aspiring to improve our lot. Envy is an attribute which stokes the embers in us and lead us the primrose way. Ego and envy together are a lethal combination making our lives miserable leading to avoidable unhappiness and frustration. Our envy can provoke us to maim others emotionally, psychologically, and physically. An unbridled envy can lead us astray and we will shamelessly lampoon the source of envy. Some may resort to violence and spreading calumny. Envy can make us disparage others. All these will lead to bad blood. The gentle flame of envy can be turned into adoration and inspiration to achieve what others have.

Expectations are a spoilsport. When things do not happen the way we expect, we get exasperated. This attribute happens many a times when we expect a lot from our parents, children, friends, governments, authorities, God, fate, and the host of other things. When we expect we are creating a trap for ourselves. A reasonable expectation is fine. However, when things happen in due course due to the dynamics of Universe, we rejoice a lot, and we are in an exuberant mood. Expectations are most of the times huge and the likelihood of it being fulfilled are remote. Many a times due to unreasonable expectations we end up souring the relationships. When expectations are not up to the mark then we ruin our happiness and peace. Happiness= efforts/expectations is the simple cardinal principle we need to keep in mind. This attribute is the sole cause of strained relationships between husband and wife as well as children and parents and employers and employees.

An inference can be drawn that these three words beginning from capital E are our worst enemies as they ensnare us in the quagmire of misery. To be happy we must keep these dangerous enemies Ego, Envy and Expectation at bay. If we are serious about our happiness, we need to weed out these three wild shrubs from the garden of our minds. For a simple, blissful, and serene life we must drive away these enemies from our being.